Monday, April 20, 2009

Light reading this Summer.

I have no patience with people who want to kill themselves, and even less patience with people who talk extensively and lyrically about wanting to kill themselves, yet, poor unfortunates, never really manage to get it right. Try, try until you succeed, like my mother said, but as with all courses of study, half the battle is arming yourself with the correct textbook.

The author is one Mister Geo Stone, and the book, 'Suicide and Attempted Suicide'. This delightfully organised work begins with a 'Background' and proceeds to 'Methods' where it systematicaly summarises common methods used to kill oneself and proceeds to evaluate them on a pros versus cons basis. The major arteries are detailed, along with the bones they lie alongside, for easy identification. The angle of slashing is explained. If you're still in practice, he helpfully suggests locations to cut that will result in least social attention. And if you'd rather slash-and-tell, more prominent places as well.

The book is full of these gems:

"..You may prefer to use an ankle vein in order to avoid wrist scars, and subsequent tedious cocktail-party conversation."

"As methods of suicide, cutting and stabbing have little to recommend them: compared to lower-trauma asphyxias (see "Hanging" and "Asphyxia" chapters) they are, generally, more painful, and no faster or more reliable. Their major advantage is that (depending on site and method) you may, after the injury, have some time to change your mind."

Apart from the excellent and commendably detailed instructions, also very entertaining glossary section (H: Hanging (suicide, attempt to; see also Method (impractical), Method (slow), Method (unsuccessful) ), I find it supremely refreshing that there is no moralising.

A short and precisely worded Background chapter makes a classification of the persons who are likely to attempt suicide and some speculation as to their reasons. There is no Bible thumping, none of the usually inevitable and wholly tedious Right to Die argument, no sympathy, no justification. Just no emotion at all.

I loved it.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Dude the Obscure.

The urge to cut and run just when things have cautiously indicated that they are going to go well, is an urge that is tiringly familiar. It's annoying, but it's there. Like a puppy that insists on following you everywhere and humps your leg when you stop moving.

I'm not an animal lover. Kittens frighten me. Puppies, of course, hump my leg.

Anyway.


I've spent most of my life being invisible, being a part of the walls; beginning to blog was the decision to walk out of them and put myself 'out there' in some limited and (limitedly) controlled manner, to make a change. But this has become less about the posting and more about the reactions. It has become less new, less sexy, less fun. I'm bored.

I'm going back into happy obscurity.

Until I'm back - if you've any good taste, you'll miss me. ;) For everyone else, there's always the one-fingered salute.

Love y'all. Some more than others. Most, not really.

Ta.