Friday, September 12, 2008

Much of a Muchness..

So it is the morning of a September Saturday, which is the only time in September that I oversleep without guilt. Other times, I feel a vague guilt somewhere in the depths of my stomach and then I roll over and sleep anyway. At least, I think that may be guilt. It could also be indigestion. Or my cellphone vibrating under my stomach with my mom calling me to get the hell up, have I gone into hibernation or what?

In any case, I'm pretty sure a cellphone vibrating on a full stomach can cause indigestion too.

1. Why is Sunday morning mess breakfast always aloo paratha or chola bhatura? What is so special about either? I am getting rapidly turned off by both. Not good.


2. I like my (okay, Aloo's ) big Eeyore tee shirt. So what if it looks like a nightshirt. It's a Saturday morning (9am...as far as I am concerned, that is still predawn) and if i want to wear an Eeyore tee shirt to cheer myself up when the University expects me to walk half a kilometre to the acad block to fill in a sudoku grid, I will.

Aside: all of you who don't like Winnie-the-Pooh or don't know who Eeyore is, I hope the Heffalump gets you tonight.

3. There are three people on my google talk list right now who's status messages read " is bringing sexy back!" I see I'm going to have to choose my friends better.

To all of you: One day I will be rich, and then one day I will be old and rich. And sometime around then I will make a will. And I will not forget that one dark day of my youth, you all quoted Justin Timberlake. And not secretly and furtively, either, but in PUBLIC VIEW. Next you will bead your hair and read Sweet Valley High.

Ok I think I just grossed myself out. ><

4. I don't like rats. I'm sure they don't like me either, but that is neither here nor there. I am indifferent to rats when they remain in their territory (read: Universal Set (Everywhere) less Set (my room) ) and I'm sure they are quite the well-bred charmers on their homeground, but what they are in my territory is UGLY, FAT, NOSE-WIGGLING, BUTT-JIGGLING, TREMBLY FREAKS.
I want them out, and I want them dead. The next bhaiyyaji who benignly watches while the rat is calmly climbing out of my room and I am shitting my pants in fear/annoyance/revulsion/shock (HOW CAN YOU JUST STAND THERE, YOU LOSER BHAIYAJI??!! ) at the same, and informs me that they are "bhagwaan" gets my Agnostic foot up the business end of his God-fearing ass.


5. I am not ever going to any Yahoo or MSN related site again. All they can talk about is fall fashions. I have much to say about fall-fashions too. They consist of worn out floaters, limp dupattas, crumpled, limp cotton, feet so tanned that they are stripy (If you like me, I look like a zebra, and if you don't, I look like a leper.), and the all-pervading odour of perspiration and depression. And damned if I can decide which odour is the worse.

But, you say, these are SUMMER fashions!!

I nod meaningfully.

I think I have made my point. *Smugness*

6. I am suddenly philosophical. I ponder on several deep and fundamental questions but I find no answer.

Will Cute Giggler ever give me marks?

Will 3 spoonfuls of Vanish Shakti O2 burn a hole in my shirt?

Overpriced milky cold coffee or sickly-sweet milky cold coffee? (Yeah we have 2 competing mess caterers...who was the smug b---- who said competition increases product quality?)

Decisions. Questions.

I exhaust myself.

I think I will sleep now.

See y'all soon, me homies. Or maybe not. I have a vague feeling that I will sleep right into Sunday evening. Again, this feeling could merely be indigestion. Have I mentioned this before?


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PS: Sindhu - I haven't forgotten about your tag. I just dont like the loser pics google is coming up with in the search results. Will post as soon as nice pics are found.

6 comments:

Jil Jil Ramamani said...

U were watching the rat doing the butt-jiglings?? Didnt we just mutually enlighten each other on better specimens in the University?? Or was that all a oily-bhindi induced dream?

Spaz Kumari said...

one was out of happy choice, the other out of compulsion ya. :-D

As for oily bhindi....ok i know ONE person who's going to have indigestion anyway..... :-D

Sij said...

I dont know who you are save for a lawyer-to-be from Mumbai but if i can write half as good as you maybe in the next couple of million light years..i'd consider myself blessed.
Ps-I dont think you would but if Blogger tags my blog details with this comment,Kindly suppress your curiosity.The cat has already paid the price.

Unknown said...

I take it you were also grossed out by the army of rats cooking in Ratatouille? If not you have a contradiction, deal with it!

But seriously, I can't believe the hygiene aspect completely slipped the minds of the creative geniuses.

Spaz Kumari said...

@sij: I'm from Chennai, but thank you very much indeed :D

@priya: those were cute, clean cartoony rats. These are local-type plague-carriers. Plus they arent cute. Also, i dont want a cartoon rat in my room either.
Plus Mickey Mouse has effectively removed any stigma of any sort on cartoon rats, i think :D

Anonymous said...

"gets my Agnostic foot up the business end of his God-fearing ass"

don't trust the posterior of bhaiyyaji... u don't know where its been